it's been about a week already, and i only had the guts to talk about it now.

my cellular phone of 10 & 1/2 months was stolen sometime after my 19th. i have no one to blame but myself i guess... my stupidity, complacency and carelessness for the most part accounts for its loss. it's particularly depressing how this inspired so many unfortunate events to follow. i feel so down nowadays, it's almost a common occurrence for me to just glumly stare into space and think all those ugly thoughts. i've also been so spendthrift lately -- is that a coping mechanism? i can't believe i could be so unlucky. :(

if there's one thing this experience taught me, it's responsibility. i'm not growing any younger, and ignorance is not an excuse. it's a big fucking world out there -- at times a little compassionate, but oftentimes a heartless one. (and it's Christmas season dammit!) .. this is one hell of a lesson in maturity that i'm forcefed into. i shouldn't be too idealistic anymore.

re-enter the cynical world, ellie.

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even with all this trauma, necessity prods me to have to get a new cell number. and so to all my friends please disregard all messages or calls sent through my old globe #... lest you want yourself to get in trouble :|

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and oh, i REALLY REALLY HATE BLOGGER BETA!!! %$^#@*(!!!
took me more than two hours just to sign in! now that's luck!

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